Saying Goodbye to a Legend

Today, 11/30/2007, we lost a pop culture icon. Evel Kenievel was bigger than life for me when I was a kid. He jumped over big things with motorcycles. There were huge staged explosions. And chances were, he would lay down or just straight out crash his bike on impact when trying to stick a landing. There were very few things in life more entertaining to a boy than a true to life Daredevil. Of course, after growing up a bit, I realized Evel battled a lot of demons such as alcoholism, prescription drug abuse and domestic violence.


After seeing Knievel jump cars, buses, RVs, and the like for a few years I had to have the Evel Knievel toys. I had the Evel Knievel stunt cycle (check it out), it was the coolest. I would crank this cycle up and crash it into everything I possibly could, much to the dismay of my parents who didn't really want their coffee tables and walls dinged up by 2 pound hunk of plastic flying around all over the house.


Then on September 8, 1974 I saw the most bizarre thing on TV I had ever seen. Now, by most bizarre, you have to remember I am not old enough to have seen Lee Harvey Oswald shot in Dallas on live TV and the OJ Simpson slow speed Bronco chase hadn't happened yet. Another day, we can discuss the most twisted things ever seen on live tv. Anyway, back in 1974, Evel Knievel decided to strap himself into a modified rocket and shoot himself (Wiley Coyote-esque) over the Snake River Canyon in Idaho. The distance from the end of the take off ramp to the beginning of the landing ramp was roughly 1500 feet. You have to realize that 1500 feet across wasn't the scary part, it was the fact that he was going to be roughly 2000 feet from the bottom of the canyon. Now add the fact that Evel needed to propel this rocket (again, Wiley Coyote-Esq) approx 800-1000 feet above the rim of the canyon. So, now that 2000 feet to the bottom just got increased to almost 3000 feet, or about 2/3-3/4 of a mile to fall if something goes wrong...what could go wrong?


My dad really had no interest in watching a performance of this magnitude. You have to remember, this was 1974 and the Cowboys were probably playing ball or Arnold Palmer was playing golf that day. So, I was forced to witness this moment in sports/sports entertainment history on a small 9 inch black and white tv equipped with rabbit ears...remember, this is many moons before cable. But for a 6 year old in 1974, this was the biggidy bomb. After all the hoopla and interviews, jump time finally came. Like other things later in life (only a couple of times, mind you) it seems like the whole thing was over before it began.


The rocket shot off the ramp and the parachute accidentally deployed immediately causing the speed to drop drastically and the rocket to gain virtually no altitude. The rocket, as well as the spirits of millions of Knievel fans, crashed and burned on live television. He was rescued, but there would be no Snake River II.



Even as an old contrary fart, Evel Knievel was a daredevil until the day he died. He was more of a showman than P.T. Barnum and more of a promoter than Don King and Vince McMahon combined. He could have sold tickets to a Somoan Tiddlywink contest and made it seem to have the highest level of danger imaginable.


We so enjoyed watching you laugh in the face of danger. Thank you for all the memories. Evel, you will be missed!

Sleepless in Arkansas

So much to say, so little sanity left to write it. I am coming to you today from lovely Ft. Smith, AR. I have been drafted to come up to the Sam's Club here and help get them caught up on things that they are behine on. Unfortunately getting them caught up on these things requires working overnights. Which is worse, sleeping less than 6 hours since Sunday or being so tired that almost every word is misspelled and requires a backspace? Let me know your thoughts on this matter. But enough whining and complaining from me about lack of sleep...I always told Kahri that I would get all the sleep I need when I am dead, but I am beginning to rethink that position.

Let's get started and talk a little politics, shall we? Now, if you are like me, you have been tittering on pins and needles on when Barbara Striesand will endorse a candidate for president. I know, I can hardly make it through a day without calling her personal assistant and asking what Bab's thinks I should do when it comes to issues such as stain removal, the type of wine that really compliments a good room temperature bree, and most of all how to expound your liberal dribble concerning the environment to the "little people" then turn around and do the exact opposite in your own life because she really cares! Read on to see her pic for the prez...I am sure it is no surprise.

WASHINGTON (AP) - Barbra Streisand, who hedged her bets months ago with donations to Hillary Rodham Clinton, Barack Obama and John Edwards, has settled on one presidential candidate.
It's Hillary.

"Madame President of the United States ... it's an extraordinary thought. We truly are in a momentous time, where a woman's potential has no limitations," Streisand said in a statement released Tuesday by the Clinton campaign. "Hillary Clinton has already proven to a generation of women that there are no limits for success."

The Oscar-winning actress and singer is a FOB—Friend of Bill Clinton—and the endorsement is hardly surprising. In Hollywood, as in politics, timing is everything, and Streisand's endorsement comes one day after another entertainment superstar, Oprah Winfrey, announced she would campaign for Clinton rival Barack Obama.

"Hillary is a powerful voice for change as we find our country at an important crossroads. Under her leadership, our country will regain its respect within the global community. She will prioritize issues of global climate change, universal health care and rebuilding a strong economy. After eight long years, the public will once again have faith in their government," said Streisand, a longtime supporter of Democratic candidates.

In the statement, Hillary Clinton said she was honored for the support.

"Barbra has used her immense talent to be an advocate for truth, justice, and fairness and I deeply appreciate her confidence in my candidacy as we work together to change the direction of our nation," Clinton said.


Okay...that's all I got today. I can go no more. Stay tuned tomorrow for more of the Take that Doesn't Suck!


Ft Smith, OUT!

Day One

Expectations and emotions are running high in anticipation of this magnimus blogging debut. And I certainly hope this will not disappoint. Let's start out with this little diddy (not p diddy) from the wonderful world of Wisconsin. Apparently, life up in the big Wis runs a little slow. Read on...

WAUPACA, Wis. (AP) -- A man who was upset with his wife for not buying beer took vengeance by shooting the family's two pet goats, prosecutors say.

Peter W. Mischler, 48, was charged this week in Circuit Court with mistreatment of animals, possession of a firearm while intoxicated and disorderly conduct with a dangerous weapon.

The complaint said Mischler came home Monday from hunting and became angry with his 22-year-old daughter for letting the goats out and making a mess. While she was talking on the phone to her mother, authorities said, he told her to tell his wife to bring home some beer, but his wife refused because she was already on her way home.

He then threatened to shoot the goats, according to the complaint. After his wife arrived home, she and the daughter heard four gunshots.

"He shot both of them. He killed Flash, and the officer had to kill Chloe," the daughter, Megan Mischler, said in a phone interview Wednesday. "I really don't understand why he shot them - they didn't deserve it."

She said her father had been most angry about the mess the goats made, not the beer.

The family is now grieving the loss of the two goats, Megan Mischler said.

"We took those goats swimming, we took them to Dairy Queen to get ice cream, they were completely leash-trained," she said, her voice trembling. "They were more than goats to us, they were more like a dog. And they didn't deserve this."

Peter Mischler was released on $1,000 bond. When The Associated Press called the home Wednesday evening, his wife said her husband was not available for comment.

(This version CORRECTS that two goats were shot and that incident happened Monday).)

At this point I have to say I am not sure which is more concerning, the fact that these folks (who apparently haven't been out of the trailer park very long) have goats as pets, or the fact that they named them and took them to the DQ. Either way, if you plan a sabatical to the Wis, stay out of old Pete's way unless you have a 30 pack of Nattie Light for him or he might just drop you.


Our Dufus of the Day award goes to the laziest Postal Worker ever, see the article below. He apprently lives in the ABQ. His job is so stressfull and taxing to his body, he was forced to throw some of the mail into the ditch. Of course, he opened them first to look for money or gift cards, but I am sure he would have tracked down the sender and returned it to them personally....not.

ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. -- An Albuquerque couple said they saw a mailman dump about 15 holiday cards in an irrigation ditch.

A complaint filed with the Bernalillo County Sheriff's Office states that Donald and Jeanette Garcia jumped into the ditch to rescue the mail after seeing it thrown from a postal truck while they were fishing along the Rio Grande Monday afternoon.

The Garcias said the mailman returned and confronted the Garcias, begging them to give back the mail.


They refused, and he left.

The Garcias said he backed up so they couldn't get the truck's number or license plate number.

The Garcias said much of the mail appeared to have been opened.

The Postal Service's inspector general's office has been contacted.


Hoped you enjoyed my first installment. Drop me a line and let me know the haps on the blog. For now...Court Jester out!!!

About Myself

First of all, thanks for stopping by. I know there is not much to see, YET, but come back every day or two and I promise you will not be disappointed.



I know what you are thinking....just another blog.



Everyone's got a blog, but no one's got one like the Court Jester does.



What you will find here is a daily collection of the bizarre, the moronic, the imbecilic, and most of all, the true news of the day.



Who needs CNN, MSNBC, Fox News and the like when I can bring it to ya all wrapped up in a nice little foil swan.



see illustration to the right ---->


(for the foil swan impaired)